The definition of being assertive – is to prove your opinion, state your rights and fight for your dreams in the environment which might make a person shy. With this capacity we will feel enhanced, accurately defining our desires and express our needs out loud. Assertive meaning being stubborn within reasonable boundaries, not allowing others to deploy us and to react to the disapproval in a right way. As a result, we can take duty for what is going on in the life around us, manage our lives in a better way, identify our necessities, and focus on what we want.

What does it mean to stand your ground?


  1. First of all, realize your opinion has a right to exist. It does not matter if it is supported by others or not. The point of view which has arisen in your head is original, meaning it is diverse to others. And all the different causes distrust, especially the unfamiliar. Anyone who carries unique idea should step out of the mass, and in some way to become an oppositionist. Be prepared to support your thought, if it is worth it, but try to use interpersonal communication while protecting it.

What if you are a prodigy? Your idea could costs billions, and no one but you could guess that before. Do you have any right to give up?! Sorry, but it is a crime to the mankind. If particular individuals wouldn’t dare to be themselves (i.e., stay similar to others), we would still believe it is impossible to sail around the planet Earth and return to the same place.

  1. Assertiveness presupposes the awareness of what you, as an individual, have a right to do. Ie, we can and should ask for what we want, or for what we need, same with a right to choose and to say “no.” Besides, you have a right to be a holistic human being and to accept yourself as you are, with all debilities.

  1. How to defend your beliefs? Do not prove other people are wrong, just explain reasons why you are right: show them your self-confidence so that they shouldn’t be worried, reveal experience in the accomplishments you gained before, while moving through the selected path, speak friendly and softly. Any wall of incomprehension will crash afore such conduct.

How to be more assertive?

  1. Expand your communication skills to become more assertive. It includes a strong understanding of your requests because people tend to form an attitude towards us by what we think of ourselves. Hence, the greatest style of assertive communication is based on self-confidence and admiration for During a dispute self-esteem means to own the initiative and retain self-control, and without them, you are unable to win a single disagreement. Almost certainly the debate will be lost if we lose self-control.
  2. To prove your opinion on any occasion, one should know basics of psychology and standards of human interaction. The prime move in the conversation is to learn the mindset of the opponent. Mainly his values and beliefs that are established in his ideas, needs, and interests at the level of aspirations. You can stand your ground only while talking “on the same level” with a partner. The second when you have stretched to joint intentions is crucial in a psychological way.
  3. Use special techniques of argumentation:
  • The method of definite Your dialog is built in a way to make other person answer “Yes… Yes…” at first. Afterward, it would be easier for him to agree with you on more fundamental issues.
  • The method of standard rhetoric. While supporting statements of the opponent, you can suddenly disprove all his data with powerful This approach is specially useful if the individual is too hostile.
  • Salami method: Gradually settle interlocutor to total agreement with you through receiving a partial agreement on the main issue, and after in minor concerns.
  1. Perceive any opinion you meet only as a point of view, which can be converted. And any man, despite how confident he may be, should be perceived not as a final authority, but only as a person who same as you, might be wrong and mistaken. A guarantee of success in any condition is to have confidence in yourself.
  1. Consider any dialogue or dispute as a possibility to discuss your idea, to practice it out, test how you can make it convincing in the eyes of others and provoke discussion. Such testing would be in handy in the following completing of the idea, where you want to convince and attract customers or partners.

How to act in any outcome of the dispute

  1. While trying to master assertive behavior, you should:
  • Recognize when you should, and when better not to state your point of view;
  • Identify issues you can discuss, and which ones better not to;
  • Know how to object without producing frustration, and to demonstrate your opinion without being sore to your partner.

If you feel like you should retort, try to do it diplomatically, escaping conflicts and aggressive reactions. Keep clear of sharpness and accusations of incompetence.

When feeling any personal hostility to the opponent, postpone the discussion to the appropriate time to make certain that you can calm down and set your thoughts and feelings in the right direction.

  1. Your companion might be entirely mistaken, but he does not aware of it. Don’t judge and “wear his boots.” Only patient and outstanding people do so. Identify the hidden reason of why the other person thinks and acts this way and not otherwise – and you will have the key to his actions.

Sincerely ask yourself: “How would I react and feel if I were in his place?” – You will save a lot of nerves and time. Moreover, your skill of human relations will rise radically. Honestly strive to see things through the eyes of the opponent.

Unfortunately, our closest people are often at the same time the prime obstacle to triumph. Do not take offense at anyone for different views and lack of support, especially to the loved ones. Closest people have a right to be worried about us, they want to save us from the unidentified, and impose their negative experience onto our desires.

  1. If you lose the battle, and the companion did not understand your advice, admit it while controlling anger, but without losing your “Ego.” When you start to get heated showing apparent dissatisfaction with the result of the discussion, it can put the end to the relationship or create a wound you won’t heal for long.

On the other hand, if you “won” the argument, be kind and modest, do not express joy because of it. Show gratitude to the other person for being a good listener, understanding of your point and accepting the suggestion.

Keep in mind, your abruptly improved self-confidence can be perceived as a kind of passive-aggressive behavior by others. Master your assertive communication deliberately, carefully choosing sources you use for studying. One of them is Lynda online education company, with our favorite course targeted to improve your business skills. So try it NOW, and thank us later.